apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
