nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Randomize