That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
