girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Dear god my vagina.
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