we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
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I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
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I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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