I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Randomize
