I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
