ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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