I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
