I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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