You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
