I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
BRING THE BAGELS
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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