..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
