My brain says no but my pants say off.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
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Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
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Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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