On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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