She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
