im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
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