..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
