Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Randomize
