what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
