dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
