I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
