Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
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