I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
