he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
My vagina just clenched in fear
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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