White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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