how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
25 People Confess Their Favorite Way To Annoy Their Significant Other
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
These 21 Women Share What Sexual Harassment In The Military Is Really Like
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.