That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
