I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.