when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
