I wish I could punch you in the face.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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