You were right. It hurts to walk today.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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