Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
