why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
