Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Randomize
