I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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