P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
