I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
