it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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