they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Randomize
