no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before