I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.