Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
