I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
When are your genitals available?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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