wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
i believe in u and ur pee
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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