He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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