ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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