I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
