I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
