i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
