Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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