i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize